I just got home from seeing the movie The Help with some girlfriends. This actually has nothing to do with the movie (which was really good and I highly recommend it!) but it just got me thinking...what will the movies 50 years from now reveal about our lives? What things accepted as "normal" in society now will seem horrendous to our grandchildren?
The Help (based on a book by the same title) is about black maids telling their stories about working for white southern women. Treating someone like a servant (or slave) is totally foreign to me, but I can't help but wonder what I would really think if I had been raised that way. I would never treat someone as less than an equal, would I? Do I treat all my neighbors on this planet the way I would like to be treated? It's appalling to look back into history to see how (some) white people treated (some) black people. It feels like slavery and segregation are some archaic mistakes that don't affect us anymore, but the sad truth is that it is all relatively recent history! Even more sad, slavery isn't dead. It just has a different face.
I'm thinking about all the plastic crap that is made in China. (I'm also thinking about all the other disgusting faces of current slavery that will haunt me if I spend too much time thinking about them.) So, I'm going to stick to slavery I support, however reluctantly. Buying cheap things made in cheap factories for cheap prices isn't worth the money "saved". There are SOULS working in factories, getting grossly underpaid and overworked just to save us a dime. When I take a moment to think about WHO made the majority of the THINGS I'd like to buy....well, I realize I want less. I'll be honest, this is hard. I like stuff and I don't have a lot of money. I probably will get my kids a Happy Meal toy here and there. The computer I'm typing on now was probably pieced together by starving children for all I know. I would have to go without a lot of stuff if I truly wanted to avoid supporting slavery. How do I find balance in this? If I buy Fair Trade the rest of my life, will that even make a difference?
I don't have the answers. And this is only one example.
It's much easier to judge the cruelty of past generations.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Dreams and Idiots
I had a dream last night: I was rushing to catch a bus...or was I rushing through an airport? Maybe both. I was "driving" a wheelchair with my one-year-old on my lap, one hand on the wheel and one arm struggling to keep him from falling off my lap. It seems there were constant ramps making the wheelchair speed faster and faster. Just when I thought I'd lose control, I'd skid to a spot where I could put my feet down just long enough to catch a little balance before the next decline. Sounds exactly like a metaphor for my reality!
When I finally reached the terminal (the wheelchair and baby had left the scene), I tripped and whacked my leg on a railing or something. As I was "rubbing it out" like my grandma taught me, I noticed rows and rows of people watching me, snickering. After all I had been through, my desire to be polite was non-existent...so I yelled, "What are you laughing at, you IDIOTS!!? I hope it hurts REALLY bad the next time you smack yourself...and you WILL!!"
I'd have to say this dream was spot on. I am getting to the point in my life where I'm tired of wasting energy on people who simply don't deserve it. I fully intend to stop trying to win the affection of people who just don't like me and face the fact that there are some people that I don't like...and I am better off just staying away from them. Please don't misunderstand me. I am referring to the type of people who will listen to your hardships, but inwardly snicker and judge. I am referring to the type of people who just don't understand and don't care to take the time to understand. I just don't have energy for them.
And therein lies the one of the many duplicities of human life. My heart is full of love one moment and I'm ready to kick an idiot in the shin the next.
When I finally reached the terminal (the wheelchair and baby had left the scene), I tripped and whacked my leg on a railing or something. As I was "rubbing it out" like my grandma taught me, I noticed rows and rows of people watching me, snickering. After all I had been through, my desire to be polite was non-existent...so I yelled, "What are you laughing at, you IDIOTS!!? I hope it hurts REALLY bad the next time you smack yourself...and you WILL!!"
I'd have to say this dream was spot on. I am getting to the point in my life where I'm tired of wasting energy on people who simply don't deserve it. I fully intend to stop trying to win the affection of people who just don't like me and face the fact that there are some people that I don't like...and I am better off just staying away from them. Please don't misunderstand me. I am referring to the type of people who will listen to your hardships, but inwardly snicker and judge. I am referring to the type of people who just don't understand and don't care to take the time to understand. I just don't have energy for them.
And therein lies the one of the many duplicities of human life. My heart is full of love one moment and I'm ready to kick an idiot in the shin the next.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Thankfulness
We recently had a violent thunderstorm in our city. Seemingly strong trees look like they were pulled out of the ground, roots and all. Houses were smashed and power lines were yanked. We were without electricity for 3 nights. But our roof was safe. And our basement didn't flood. These are things I am VERY thankful for.
I packed up my four kids and stayed at my mom and dad's house for a couple nights. My parents have a very small home, but large love. It was strange to see my childhood home with adult eyes...to use a cereal bowl that I used for many years in the mornings before school, but now feels foreign to me. It was refreshing to be reminded just how small the bedroom is that I shared with my sister when we were kids. Refreshing...because I sometimes feel worried that my kids' rooms are too small. I sometimes worry that I am a bad parent for not providing "bigger, better, and more" for my children. There are times that my heart squeezes when I have to say "no". There is a bittersweet sting when my daughter offers her piggy bank to buy us more food. It is too tempting to focus on all the things we do not have. But I know this kind of thinking is pure folly, because we have SO MUCH.
While we fled to air conditioning in the hot weather, my husband stayed at home to work on clearing the fallen branches and broken trees in our yard. Regardless of how many hard times we have gone through and will most likely go through in the future...I am so thankful for him. It is good for my wifely soul to see my husband with chainsaw in hand, fighting against the elements. I am thankful to have a partner with skills and kind eyes that will outlive our youth. The years have taught me that my husband is definitely the first one I'd pick to be on my team. And for that, I am thankful.
Once the power came back on and we were all settled back at home, my husband and I were exhausted. Being away from home takes its toll on me. I love my own bed. Even more, I love my children all in their own beds. I like to be surrounded by things that are familiar to me. There was so much work to catch up on, it felt like we were gone for a month. I had my dishwasher, washing machine, and clothes dryer making up for lost time. Yes, I am fully aware how dependent I am on modern inventions; I will shamelessly admit it. And I am extremely thankful for them.
I am always mindful of that fact that we are "rich" simply because we have running water. Little hardships shake me up and let my thankfulness float to the surface. Our power outage was a mere irritation when compared to the atrocities happening around the world this very second. Sometimes my global empathy swells up and cripples me with tears, but it certainly keeps me...you guessed it...thankful for my life. It is a raw kind of happiness, because I know how much worse things could be. It is an emotion of action because it drives me to make the best of what I have, to improve it within my means. It makes me want to love others and live vibrantly.
Thankfulness has served me well over the years.
I know my children will "suffer" from wants not met, dreams not reached, hardships unnumbered...just as I did. And though my mother-heart wants to protect them from all hurt, I guess I just have to hope that they will learn a lifestyle of thankfulness and add depth to their souls. So, it's okay to say "no" when my son asks me to buy a new LEGO set. And an extra delight when I can say "yes".
A perfect life is not a breeding ground for thankfulness.
Monday, June 20, 2011
Movin on out
(I started this a couple weeks ago)
We're supposed to move at the end of this month! It almost feels like this is really going to happen, but I still feel like I'm living in the shadows of a dream. The picture is becoming clearer with each box packed and each big decision behind us. We came to many conclusions last month and I'm glad those sleepless nights are behind us. Sure, there are certainly more sleepless nights ahead, but those ones have passed! I feel like there is light at the end of the tunnel. Or to be less trite, perhaps a placid lake at the end of this waterfall? Hmm.
One of the biggest decisions we faced was what we should do about the duplex we currently live in. The result has me at peace and has taught me something about balance that I am only beginning to comprehend. Our first instinct was to sell and minimize our responsibilities. We have four kids, we know all about responsibilities. It would be nice to bear a lighter yoke. An opportunity to sell didn't work out the way we thought it would, but this wouldn't be the first time. We've come close to selling FOUR times now! Each time we thought we were on the road to Easy(er) Street, we were met with some irritating road block. It seems we were meant to keep this place.
(And that's where I stopped because I ran out of time to write.)
Now it's later in the month and all I can say is I'm glad I was at peace about keeping our duplex...because it looks like we'll be living here longer than we expected. It was another hard decision, and yes, it involved more sleepless nights, but we realized we'd be making a mistake if we moved at this time. The last couple weeks were pretty hard. I don't change direction very quickly, so it felt like whiplash (again) to change direction like that. I was packing and preparing everything in my mind, thinking about where all the furniture would go. I was starting to make all the arrangements involved with moving. Then, stop. Reverse. UNpack.
Life is funny. Because it's better to laugh than to cry. Sometimes.
Now, there is an upside to this story. I haven't put much energy into "settling in" here in the last year or so. We were busy remodeling the basement to make another bedroom in preparation for Baby #4. Then, last winter, we were offered the chance to move, so I started letting things slip. Pictures need to be hung, rooms need new colors painted, and my kitchen is badly in need of reorganizing. I am overwhelmed by all the work that needs to be done, but at the same time I enjoy having purpose. Goals. I like thinking of ways to make things function and flow better. There is only so much I can do with my tiny home, but I do enjoy a challenge! Though I do hope for a bigger house some day in the future, I am so thankful for what we have.
I think a part of me knew we wouldn't be moving. It just never felt "real". Looking back, I think I've had that feeling before. I'd like to recognize it better in the future. It may save me a lot of unnecessary packing. And unpacking. Both literally and metaphorically.
We're supposed to move at the end of this month! It almost feels like this is really going to happen, but I still feel like I'm living in the shadows of a dream. The picture is becoming clearer with each box packed and each big decision behind us. We came to many conclusions last month and I'm glad those sleepless nights are behind us. Sure, there are certainly more sleepless nights ahead, but those ones have passed! I feel like there is light at the end of the tunnel. Or to be less trite, perhaps a placid lake at the end of this waterfall? Hmm.
One of the biggest decisions we faced was what we should do about the duplex we currently live in. The result has me at peace and has taught me something about balance that I am only beginning to comprehend. Our first instinct was to sell and minimize our responsibilities. We have four kids, we know all about responsibilities. It would be nice to bear a lighter yoke. An opportunity to sell didn't work out the way we thought it would, but this wouldn't be the first time. We've come close to selling FOUR times now! Each time we thought we were on the road to Easy(er) Street, we were met with some irritating road block. It seems we were meant to keep this place.
(And that's where I stopped because I ran out of time to write.)
Now it's later in the month and all I can say is I'm glad I was at peace about keeping our duplex...because it looks like we'll be living here longer than we expected. It was another hard decision, and yes, it involved more sleepless nights, but we realized we'd be making a mistake if we moved at this time. The last couple weeks were pretty hard. I don't change direction very quickly, so it felt like whiplash (again) to change direction like that. I was packing and preparing everything in my mind, thinking about where all the furniture would go. I was starting to make all the arrangements involved with moving. Then, stop. Reverse. UNpack.
Life is funny. Because it's better to laugh than to cry. Sometimes.
Now, there is an upside to this story. I haven't put much energy into "settling in" here in the last year or so. We were busy remodeling the basement to make another bedroom in preparation for Baby #4. Then, last winter, we were offered the chance to move, so I started letting things slip. Pictures need to be hung, rooms need new colors painted, and my kitchen is badly in need of reorganizing. I am overwhelmed by all the work that needs to be done, but at the same time I enjoy having purpose. Goals. I like thinking of ways to make things function and flow better. There is only so much I can do with my tiny home, but I do enjoy a challenge! Though I do hope for a bigger house some day in the future, I am so thankful for what we have.
I think a part of me knew we wouldn't be moving. It just never felt "real". Looking back, I think I've had that feeling before. I'd like to recognize it better in the future. It may save me a lot of unnecessary packing. And unpacking. Both literally and metaphorically.
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Turkey 3 Days: Turkey Gravy and Spuds
I love this easy comfort food.
First step: First Day Crock Pot Turkey
Second step: Make Gravy
Third step: Add pre-cooked turkey
Serve over mashed potatoes.
First step: First Day Crock Pot Turkey
Second step: Make Gravy
Third step: Add pre-cooked turkey
Serve over mashed potatoes.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
How to Make Gravy
There are probably oodles of ways to make gravy, but this is how I do it!
The formula to remember is 1/4 cup butter, 1/4 cup flour, 2 cups broth.
In a pot over medium heat, melt about 4 T butter. Add 1/4 cup flour, whisk to mix thoroughly. When it just begins to brown, add the broth. If I don't have broth, I use water and bouillon (like Superior Touch's Better Than Bouillon).
I like to add some garlic, parsley, and poultry seasoning or rosemary for turkey/chicken gravy. I like garlic, pepper, and savory for beef. Sometimes, I just like it very plain. Use what you like! Continue to whisk.
Heat to a boil, simmer until it thickens. It will thicken more when removed from heat.
My family ate this before I could get a picture of the final product. I have a brood of gravy lovers!
The formula to remember is 1/4 cup butter, 1/4 cup flour, 2 cups broth.
In a pot over medium heat, melt about 4 T butter. Add 1/4 cup flour, whisk to mix thoroughly. When it just begins to brown, add the broth. If I don't have broth, I use water and bouillon (like Superior Touch's Better Than Bouillon).
I like to add some garlic, parsley, and poultry seasoning or rosemary for turkey/chicken gravy. I like garlic, pepper, and savory for beef. Sometimes, I just like it very plain. Use what you like! Continue to whisk.
My family ate this before I could get a picture of the final product. I have a brood of gravy lovers!
Turkey 3 Days: Turkey Noodle Soup
First step: Turkey 3 Days: First day crock pot Turkey
Start with the broth you already made. Skim the hardened fat off the top. The stock may be like Jell-O, which is actually a good thing, as gross as it may seem. (Did you know gelatin comes from bones? Now you do!)
Chop your veggies. I like onions, carrots, celery and a little garlic. (I chopped them fairly fine this time as a ploy to make it harder for the kids to pick them out!) I drizzle a little olive oil in the pot I will use for the soup, and add veggies once the oil is hot. Stir fry until the veggies just start to soften. I go by smell. It's ready when it starts smelling good!
Then, dump your stock into the pot and add water. I have a 6-quart pot, so I fill it up to about 2 inches from the top. Once the broth is heated, I toss in some dried parsley, a few shakes of poultry seasoning or Mrs. Dash or both, a pinch of nutmeg, and salt and pepper. If the flavor isn't quite right, I'll also add a spoonful of chicken base (I like Superior Touch's Better Than Bouillon).
Once the veggies are nearly fully cooked, turn up the heat, boil, and add noodles to cook a couple minutes less than the box tells you to (they will continue cooking in the pot). My favorite noodles are nice fat "homemade" egg noodles or Kluski noodles; however, Second Son is allergic to eggs, so I have switched to regular pasta. Last, turn the stove off, and add the turkey meat you boiled previously. It is already cooked, so it just needs to get heated and will also help to cool down the soup.
Yum!
Next up: Turkey Gravy and Spuds
Start with the broth you already made. Skim the hardened fat off the top. The stock may be like Jell-O, which is actually a good thing, as gross as it may seem. (Did you know gelatin comes from bones? Now you do!)
Chop your veggies. I like onions, carrots, celery and a little garlic. (I chopped them fairly fine this time as a ploy to make it harder for the kids to pick them out!) I drizzle a little olive oil in the pot I will use for the soup, and add veggies once the oil is hot. Stir fry until the veggies just start to soften. I go by smell. It's ready when it starts smelling good!
Then, dump your stock into the pot and add water. I have a 6-quart pot, so I fill it up to about 2 inches from the top. Once the broth is heated, I toss in some dried parsley, a few shakes of poultry seasoning or Mrs. Dash or both, a pinch of nutmeg, and salt and pepper. If the flavor isn't quite right, I'll also add a spoonful of chicken base (I like Superior Touch's Better Than Bouillon).
Once the veggies are nearly fully cooked, turn up the heat, boil, and add noodles to cook a couple minutes less than the box tells you to (they will continue cooking in the pot). My favorite noodles are nice fat "homemade" egg noodles or Kluski noodles; however, Second Son is allergic to eggs, so I have switched to regular pasta. Last, turn the stove off, and add the turkey meat you boiled previously. It is already cooked, so it just needs to get heated and will also help to cool down the soup.
Next up: Turkey Gravy and Spuds
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