We recently had a violent thunderstorm in our city. Seemingly strong trees look like they were pulled out of the ground, roots and all. Houses were smashed and power lines were yanked. We were without electricity for 3 nights. But our roof was safe. And our basement didn't flood. These are things I am VERY thankful for.
I packed up my four kids and stayed at my mom and dad's house for a couple nights. My parents have a very small home, but large love. It was strange to see my childhood home with adult eyes...to use a cereal bowl that I used for many years in the mornings before school, but now feels foreign to me. It was refreshing to be reminded just how small the bedroom is that I shared with my sister when we were kids. Refreshing...because I sometimes feel worried that my kids' rooms are too small. I sometimes worry that I am a bad parent for not providing "bigger, better, and more" for my children. There are times that my heart squeezes when I have to say "no". There is a bittersweet sting when my daughter offers her piggy bank to buy us more food. It is too tempting to focus on all the things we do not have. But I know this kind of thinking is pure folly, because we have SO MUCH.
While we fled to air conditioning in the hot weather, my husband stayed at home to work on clearing the fallen branches and broken trees in our yard. Regardless of how many hard times we have gone through and will most likely go through in the future...I am so thankful for him. It is good for my wifely soul to see my husband with chainsaw in hand, fighting against the elements. I am thankful to have a partner with skills and kind eyes that will outlive our youth. The years have taught me that my husband is definitely the first one I'd pick to be on my team. And for that, I am thankful.
Once the power came back on and we were all settled back at home, my husband and I were exhausted. Being away from home takes its toll on me. I love my own bed. Even more, I love my children all in their own beds. I like to be surrounded by things that are familiar to me. There was so much work to catch up on, it felt like we were gone for a month. I had my dishwasher, washing machine, and clothes dryer making up for lost time. Yes, I am fully aware how dependent I am on modern inventions; I will shamelessly admit it. And I am extremely thankful for them.
I am always mindful of that fact that we are "rich" simply because we have running water. Little hardships shake me up and let my thankfulness float to the surface. Our power outage was a mere irritation when compared to the atrocities happening around the world this very second. Sometimes my global empathy swells up and cripples me with tears, but it certainly keeps me...you guessed it...thankful for my life. It is a raw kind of happiness, because I know how much worse things could be. It is an emotion of action because it drives me to make the best of what I have, to improve it within my means. It makes me want to love others and live vibrantly.
Thankfulness has served me well over the years.
I know my children will "suffer" from wants not met, dreams not reached, hardships unnumbered...just as I did. And though my mother-heart wants to protect them from all hurt, I guess I just have to hope that they will learn a lifestyle of thankfulness and add depth to their souls. So, it's okay to say "no" when my son asks me to buy a new LEGO set. And an extra delight when I can say "yes".
A perfect life is not a breeding ground for thankfulness.
